Parents of Suzette, Judy and Pierre Lapointe
My father, John Armand Lapointe, and my mother, Rita Lapointe, died only 99 days apart.
Before their deaths, control of their affairs was transferred to my brother through power of attorney.
This happened after my father made repeated threats to kill a neighbor
—
not as a one-time event, but as part of a long-standing pattern of behaviour.
These kinds of threats were not unusual in our home. Guns had to be removed because the risk was real.
Despite this, there was no meaningful protection for my mother
I watched my brother escalate conflicts to his financial benefit all the time I know my brother.
A Lifetime of Abuse
I grew up in a home defined by control, fear, and ongoing abuse.
My mother lived with constant threats and believed she could not leave, because she feared the system would make things worse rather than protect her.
From my own experience, that fear was justified.
When I left abuse in my own life, the system did not reduce it — it increased it.
Alzheimer’s — Her Way Out
In later years, my mother developed Alzheimer’s.
She told me something I will never forget:
During conflict, she would stand face to face with my father and say,
“I don’t have to fight with you anymore — I have Alzheimer’s and can’t remember what you just said.”
Then she would laugh and walk away.
She explained that by doing this, she could stop the conflict and take back control. Her illness became the only way she could safely disengage from her abuser.
What Happened Next
After power of attorney was established:
- assets were sold
- control over finances was centralized
- and within a short period, both of my parents were gone
The Unanswered Questions
There are serious and unresolved questions:
- Where did the assets go?
- Were my mother’s wishes followed?
- Why is there no clear accounting?
My mother was clear her entire life:
All three of her children were to share equally.
That was her value.
That was her intention.
The Pattern Continues
My brother has not come forward and cannot be found.
At the same time, I am being required to repeatedly explain his absence in order to access my sister’s estate.
The Question That Matters
If the system is focused on finding my brother to protect his share…
Is it also interested in what happened to the estate he controlled?